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Kategoriarkiv: Känslor

Turkos

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Jag älskar turkost! Nu har vi även piffat upp lägenheten med denna underbara färg. Symbolik för färgen turkos: Healing, tålamod, lugn, harmoni, balans. Turkos är en blandning av grönt (balans) och blått (kommunikation) och tolkas därefter. Grönt symboliserar harmoni, balans, förnyelse, healing och kännetecknar barmhärtighet, kärlek och empati. Det är fridens, tillväxtens och sympatins färg. […]

Sam Bailey – Skyscraper

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Just amazing..

Lic. Personlig Tränare

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Har ni någon gång känt hur tanken ”livet kan inte bli bättre just nu” inte bara flugit förbi utan även fått er att stanna till i nuet och skapat en stark medveten lycka? Just den känslan hade jag när jag satt med några klasskamrater på Broken i Stockholm i söndags. Jag hade klarat slutexaminationen på […]

My illusion, my mistake

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När man inte orkar springa mer, när benen värker och man måste kämpa för att få ner luft i lungorna. Då har man alltid mer att ge. Jag tror på människor. Jag tror på ärlighet. Då stora och viktiga ord bara är bokstäver och jag ännu en gång får stämpla ordet naiv i pannan på […]

Och om jag vore svag?

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Jag får ofta höra att jag är stark, psykiskt. (får inte den kommentaren på gymmet) Vart sitter den styrka andra ser i mig? För jag känner mig som ett torkat höstlöv på en tungt trafikerad motorväg. Jag är stark i vem jag är och vad jag vill med mitt liv. Jag slåss med kropp och […]

Att aldrig höras mer

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Alla vi som förlorat någon riktigt nära kommer nog aldrig förstå oss på människor som säger hejdå till människor dom tycker om eller kanske till och med älskar. Att välja bort någon som fortfarande lever. Jag kommer aldrig förstå. Det gör mig så ont att veta att en vacker dag är chansen till någonting annat […]

Karusellen

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Jag försöker plugga, men det går inte att fokusera… Det är som att hela min individ just nu befinner sig i en karusell där jag bara kan försöka hålla i mig. Nu väntar några dagars välbehövlig semester. Ska köra ner till Norrköping på onsdag, sedan ta tåget till Kristianstad och träffa många efterlängtade vänner! Anton […]

Dags att bryta ihop och komma igen

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En axelluxation och fem veckors sjukskrivning. Imorgon ska jag träffa sjukgymnasten och lägga upp en rehabplan. Jag ska sätta upp mål, jag behöver mål. Helst på gränsen till orealistiska, då blir jag som mest motiverad. Jag vände snabbt på tanken till att det finns en mening med detta och att jag kommer bli grym på […]

Tillsammans tog vi guld

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Ofattbart. Jag har nog inte riktigt förstått det än. Minns min första hockeymatch. Det var i Ladan och jag fick en varmkorv i ena pausen. Gissningsvis 2-3 år. Sedan dess har jag älskat hockey. När jag var liten var det hockeykväll på torsdagar. Då fick jag vara uppe sent. Skellefteå var inte i närheten av […]

Besvikelse

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En av få känslor som stöter iväg mig på riktigt. Nothing is for real, And You know it I’m just gonna let it out – Jaded, Takida

Ge upp

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Inte min starka sida, att ge upp alltså. Jag fightas, jag kämpar, jag ser alltid nya lösningar, jag offrar, jag vägrar ge upp. Jag vägrar ge upp även det gånger det är det bästa alternativet. Kan det ens vara ett bra alternativ? Ja, det kan det. Det vet jag, men att få hela min kropp […]

Glassheart

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Ibland har jag svårt att veta åt vilket håll jag ska gå. Att få se saker med egna ögon räcker inte. Jag behöver någon som berättar för mig vad det är jag ser. Jag förstår. Jag vill inte förstå. Jag väljer att känna känslan igen. Som om allt bara varit en dålig dröm. Jag är […]

Hemlängtan

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Pratade med Sanna idag och fick mer hemlängtan än jag haft på länge. När jag berättade att jag har funderat på att söka jobb i Skellefteå när jag är klar med min utbildning säger Sanna att hon redan har planerat det. Hon har även planerat att jag ska träffa kärleken där hemma, så att jag […]

Flyr du från jobbiga känslor?

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Jag vet inte hur just du agerar, men jag vet att väldigt många flyr när kroppen fylls av en riktigt jobbig känsla, för vissa räcker nog en jobbig känsla. Kanske kommer känslan leda till okontrollerade tårar som skär mer än salt i ett köttsår. Då är det bättre att snabbt som ögat ringa en vän […]

Håll mig hårt eller släpp mig helt

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En lycklig version av mig, i en ljus lägenhet i något som blivit hemma. Jag känner mig levande. Jag känner mig omtyckt och vissa dagar känner jag mig till och med vacker. Mitt emot mig i soffan sitter en nära vän, hon ser på mig och ler ”det var länge sedan jag såg dig såhär […]

Ett möte utan mening

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Man vinner inte alla matcher. Man får inte alltid det man vill. Men jag tror att man en dag får det man förtjänar, så länge man alltid ger allt man kan. Hejdå allt jag valde. Hejdå allt jag inte valde. Go for someone who is not only proud to have you, but will also take […]

Styrkan i att försöka välja sig själv

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Det är inte alltid lätt. Ibland är det jävligt svårt. Men sen blir allt sådär fantastiskt underbart igen. Visst blir det? Jag har tagit ett steg åt sidan. Nu betraktar jag mig själv från en annan vinkel. Jag kan se hur jag tidigare varit förblindad av min egen vilja, det suddiga blir mer klart och […]

Kärlek

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När jag vaknar alldeles för tidigt, bara för att jag inte vill sova bort minuter jag i vaket tillstånd kan njuta mer av. När jag somnar med samma person i mina tankar som jag vaknar med. När det låter i min telefon och min första tanke är att jag hoppas att det är en viss […]

Det lyckliga slutet

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De minnen som dyker upp är inte längre i färg. Likgiltigheten tar större och större plats. Känslan av att inte finnas. Igen. Ett val jag själv aldrig tagit men blivit tvingad att leva efter. Det räcker inte med att vilja när någon annan väljer att du inte får vara. Känslan har inte varit balanserad, kanske […]

Första snön är här

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Jag älskar ljuset som blir när snön kommer. Ikväll sätter jag mig på tåget ner till Stavsjö. Jag längtar samtidigt som det alltid är lika jobbigt att åka ifrån hemma. Hemma är bäst, kommer alltid vara bäst. Jag önskar jag kunde packa med mig Kisen, Lill-Kisen, Spinky, massa människor och lugnet som finns här. Mot […]